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Football Pulse

Football Pulse archive - March 2011

VID (31/03): Zinedine Zidane falls over after being tackled by a divot. Not much else to say really.

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QUIZ (30/3): Today The Pulse office has mostly been agonising over this. The royal blue one with the 'Heinz' logo is really annoying us! Best of luck.

STORY (30/03): 'Big Phil' has lifted the lid on his Chelsea hell. Former Blues boss Scolari has revealed that he wanted to sell Didier Drogba and that Michael Ballack was jealous of midfield rival Deco.

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STORY (29/03): Colombian fans take a corpse to see Cucuta Deportivo v Envigado after a fan is shot.

VID (29/03): Robin van Persie's five-year-old son shows his daddy why he's better than Nicklas Bendtner.

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VID (28/03): Long-time readers of The Gaffer will be familiar with the work of Brazilian goalkeeper Rogerio Ceni. Already officially the highest-scoring goalkeeper in the world, he scored his 100th goal for Sao Paulo against Corinthians on Sunday. We think their fans were quite pleased.

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VID (27/03): Scotland may well approach today's clash against Brazil with some trepidation considering they've never beaten the Samba Boys in nine attempts. They came mighty close at the 1974 World Cup though - forward to 2:35 for Billy Bremner's agonising miss.

VID (27/03): Argentinian side Juventud Catolica decide they have had enough of the referee's dodgy decisions and instead of the captain having a quiet word with the officials they opt to beat him up instead. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

STORY (26/03): Liverpool midfielder Jonjo Shelvey has apologised and closed down his Twitter after an explicit photograph was posted on his account for the viewing pleasure of his 55,000 followers. One Twitter user ENKAY commented: 'Kenny Dalglish will not be amused with that tackle.'

VID (26/03): He may have been out of the game for nearly five years, but Zinedine Zidane still has a box full of tricks as he runs rings around this young goalkeeper.

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VID (25/03): Ever wondered if Carlos Tevez has the voice of an angel? Well decide for yourselves after he got up on stage with an Argentinian crooner. It could be a new career path for him when he eventually decides to retire.

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STORY (24/03): Hot on the heels of yesterday's football generator comes another slice of sport science. Eggheads from Qatar University have designed an 'artificial cloud' to stop players keeling over from heat exhaustion at the 2022 World Cup.

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STORY (23/03): Boffins have made a football which generates electricity during matches to provide clean energy in developing countries. A 15-minute kickabout would give a family three hours of LED light!

VID (23/03): 'I like football, I love Chelsea'. David Luiz's English is improving by the day.

VID (23/03): Proof that at least one Man City striker has a sense of humour as Edin Dzeko makes fun out of team-mate Mario Balotelli in the aftermath of 'Bibgate'.

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VID (22/03): Fancy a bit of heart-warming inspiration on a Tuesday morning? Have a gander at the true story of Thailand's TMB Panyee FC, who built their own pitch in the sea and went on to achieve great things.

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VID (21/03): QPR magician Adel Taarabt has been named the Championship's Player of the Year. Here's why.

VID (21/03): Something tells us Shakhtar Donetsk's players aren't happy about drawing Barcelona in the Champions League quarter-finals.

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VID (20/03): The sexiest damn football table you've ever clapped eyes on. Coming to Premier League 'cribs' soon, no doubt.

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VID (19/03): This wonderful slice of schadenfreude is all over the t'interweb like a cheap suit today, and who are we to stand in the way of a viral? Ball hits man in face. Hard.

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VID (18/03): Bizarre scenes from Italy as AC Milan v Bari begins with a warm-up that includes players fencing, throwing a frisbee and reading a paper. Don't be too alarmed about the future of football though as the players involved are all lookalikes and this is only for a new sports commercial.

VID (18/03): Mario Balotelli was doomed to fail in last night's Europa League clash with Dynamo Kiev. Famous for temper tantrums and spitting out his dummy, the petulant Man City striker couldn't even dress himself in the pre-match warm-up. Bib 1 Balotelli 0.

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STORY (17/03): Fulham boss Mark Hughes has defended plans for a Michael Jackson statue to be erected at Craven Cottage. The late singer was a friend of chairman Mohamed Al Fayed and watched one match in 1999 - a 2-0 win over Wigan. At least he can't be accused of being a glory supporter.

VID (17/03): A little bit of rain doesn't stop this Carioca Championship Serie B match between Itaperuna and Aperibeense from being played in Brazil. The players might need some armbands though.

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VID (16/03): Carlos Tevez has his snood in a twist over an animated segment on an Argentinian comedy show called 'Ugly Carlitos', which takes the mick out of him and his girlfriend.

VID (16/03): Today is Don Revie Day - the 50th anniversary of the Don's appointment as Leeds manager. Videos like this are a belated (and, let's face it, futile) attempt to change how he is remembered by non-Leeds fans. And it's impossible to tire of watching this.

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PICS (15/03): Who said footballers have no class? Didier Drogba's birthday cake features three naked women (marzipan) and is served by another naked woman (real). Many happy returns.

PIC (15/03): Most new signings are given a replica shirt to wear for their first photocall. They obviously do things a bit differently at Russian Northern Caucus club Anzhi, as Roberto Carlos discovers.

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VID (14/03): Cesena striker Emanuele Giaccherini puts himself in the running for miss of the season. You can forgive him for the first, but the rebound...

STORY and VID (14/03): Four red cards, vile chants, three arrests and six fans ejected. Just another day in the FA Youth Cup.

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STORY (13/03): This may interest Chelsea fans who have Michael Essien's name tattooed on the back of their shirt. The midfielder's estranged father has vowed to stop his son using the family name.

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ARTICLE (12/03): Finally someone dares to puts the brakes on the increasingly vile assasination of referees after every single contentious decision in high-profile matches. Shame it's a journalist saying it and not someone more influential. A good read nonetheless.

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VID (11/03): The pain etched on Ecuador's LDU Quito's Hernan Barcos says it all in this rather grimacing incident with Uruguayan side Penarol's Dario Rodriguez in the Copa Libertadores. Ouch.

VID (11/03): The on-pitch Italian reporter doesn't pick the best moment to start interviewing
AC Milan's Clarence Seedorf after they crashed out of the Champions League.

VID (11/03): Remember Gareth Bale's brilliant performances for Spurs against Inter Milan in the Champions League? You won't remember it quite like this though...

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VID (10/03): Man does keepie-uppies at the top of a lamppost. There's not really much more to say.

STORY (10/03): A thirteen-year-old Reading fan sues the club over 'Sigurdsson' replica shirt after the player's sold - and wins! That could open the floodgates...

VID (10/03): Shouty Italian pundit Tiziano Crudeli was at it again last night as his beloved AC Milan were knocked out of the Champions League by Spurs.

VID (10/03): Ref Peter Walton forgot to take his cards onto the pitch for Everton v Birmingham last night, so came across all Marcel Marceau as he brandished an imaginary yellow card at Jordon Mutch.

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VID (09/03): Arsenal may be unhappy about Robin van Persie's red card at the Nou Camp last night, but imagine the furore if the Dutchman was sent off for rugby-tackling a Borat-style streaker. And while we're on the subject of pitch-invaders, it would be rude to ignore this hilarious collection.

STORY (09/03): What do footballers spend their hard-earned cash on? Aston Villa and England winger Stewart Downing was forced to reveal that he splashed out 45,000 on a home cinema during the trial of his former agent. Still not as extravagant as Nani's life-size marble statue - of himself.

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VID (08/03): Derby fans won't remember Estaban Fuertes (eight games, one goal) with much fondness. He's rather more popular at delightfully-named Argentinian side Colon. Here's why

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PIC (07/03): Pictures of Nani's gashed knee have been doing the rounds on the web following Jamie Carragher's tackle at Anfield on Sunday. Pretty bad but worthy of uncontrollable sobbing?

VID (07/03): Liverpool's terrific performance is in danger of being forgotten amidst all the Carragher rancour and United's media blackout. Let's look back then on a north west derby that was memorable solely for the football. Surely the best Liverpool-Man Utd clash in the Premier League era?

VID (07/03): Dare we suggest that Derby goalkeeper Stephen Bywater isn't the sharpest tool? Check out his baffled, dead pan answer to the reporter's question after 55 secs in this clip. Priceless. He's certainly 'got form' when it comes to hilarious post-match interviews.

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VID (05/03): We've found yet another clip claiming to show the 'worst miss of all time'. It's certainly a contender from Harrow's Rocky Baptiste. As one fan shouts in the background, 'What's he done?!'

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VID (04/03): It's Liverpool v Manchester United on Sunday; Dalglish against Ferguson. So let's check out some 80s classics when the two managers didn't have a grey hair between them. A 3-3 classic in 1988, an FA Cup semi in 1985 and a United win in 1989.

GAME (04/03): Plenty of fun has been made of Ashley Cole's air-gun lunacy. Now you can find out what it feels like to be the gun-toting full-back, with this online game. Good luck!

VID (04/03): Eric Cantona says his infamous kung fu kick on a Crystal Palace fan was one of the best moments of his career. It's worth another look, isn't it?

STORY AND VID (04/03): An Argentine ref has managed to break a new world record by sending off 36 players. Check out the story here and then view footage of the incredible incident.

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VID (03/03): We reckon this viral vid's as fake as a League Two WAG's tan, but certainly worthy of a gander - Borussia Dortmund filming trick shot videos on a moving bus.

FEATURE (03/03): Soccerlens takes a look at the evolution of the 'target man' and why Wayne Rooney's the 'false nine'.

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VID (01/03): Ashley Cole's air rifle exploits have been turned into a very odd animation by a Taiwan news service. Be warned it's over-the-top and a touch gruesome, the cartoon Cole doesn't look anything like him either.

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VID (01/03): With Ryan Giggs on the eve of his 20th anniversary at Manchester United, take a look back at this early glimpse of his wizardry for Salford Schoolboys at Anfield in 1988. And here's his first ever TV interview.

OPINION (01/03): Staying with the boy formerly known as Wilson, there seem to be no original words of praise for Britain's most decorated player. This is certainly a refreshing new angle though.