Football Pulse archive - March 2012

VIDEO (30/03): Vinnie Jones has tried to reinvent himself as an actor since retiring as a footballer. Anyway, here's his 'acting skills' put to use in an earlier foray as a wrestler. Be warned, it's not pretty.

PICTURE (30/03):
German side Magdeburg have been struggling to score a goal of late. In fact, their failure to find the target led to their fans to helpfully point the way to the opposition goal from the stands.

VIDEO (28/03):
According to Crawley Town boss Steve Evans, this 22-man brawl between his side and Bradford City last night was 'handbags'. Looks more like a massive punch-up to us.

VIDEO (23/03): Ever wondered how David James has been getting on at Bristol City. Well, he's still living up to the 'Calamity' nametag as this remarkable own goal shows in the 2-0 home defeat to Watford earlier in the week. An example in how not to punch the ball.

VIDEO (22/03): Lionel Messi's scored a few goals for Barcelona in his time, 234 of them in fact. Here's every single one of them in 14 glorious minutes. Needless to say, with so many classics it's hard to pick a favourite. We're big fans of the commentary for goal No.19.

VIDEO (20/03): Vittorio Esposito has become a cult hero after an amazing act of sportsmanship in an Italian Amateur Cup clash between his side US Termoli and Torres. After winning a dodgy 90th-minute penalty, Esposito was overcome by guilt. Check out what he did next.

VIDEO (20/03): Phil Jones' rapid ascent to stardom with Manchester United and England has seen more cameras pointing at him, and they've been picking up some truly extraordinary expressions. One United fan (presumably a student or 'between jobs') has even produced this song in tribute to Jones' gurning.

VIDEO (19/03):
Barely a weekend goes by without Lionel Messi scoring a wonder goal and he's at it again against Sevilla, complete with a nutmeg and a chip en route to scoring.

VIDEO (16/03): Delightful finish, but it came after one of the weediest throws we've ever seen from a goalie. Pathetic.

VIDEO (16/03): Your team-mate's just been sent off so, what do you do? You punch the referee of course, well, you do if your Tanzanian footballer  Stephano Mwasika.

VIDEO (15/03): Chelsea's old guard were certainly up to their old tricks against Napoli last night. Terry orchestrated his defence, Lampard smacked in a penalty and Drogba...well, just did what he usually does. Check out the sneaky peak to double check the referee has fallen for his disgraceful swan dive.

VIDEO (15/03): Tottenham could do worse than snap up Rafael van der Vaart's five-year-old son Damian judging by this video of him training. You can hear his proud dad occasionally roaring in the background.

VIDEO (15/03): If you haven't caught Premier League chairman Dave Richards' tumble into a water feature at a Qatar conference yet, then wait no longer.

VIDEO (15/03): Under 8s game abandoned due to crowd trouble! Topless Lech Poznan fans invaded an indoor club junior game, lit flares and chanted incessantly. So many streamers landed on the playing area, the game couldn't go ahead. Check out the nutters

VIDEO (13/03): Ladies and gents, boys and girls, this is how you pass a football. All credit to Nicklas Barkroth of UD Leiria, for setting up a goal with this cross.

VIDEO (08/03):
Templeuve vs Quevy in Belgium and striker Lecomte is knocked unconscious in the penalty area before being taken off on a stretcher. The referee isn't convinced and, quite incredibly, books him for diving! Check out the medical assistant's face as the card comes out.

VIDEO (08/03): Eyebrows were raised last summer when Arsenal signed little-known Carl Jenkinson from Charlton. A little glimpse into the defender's bedroom might shine some light on why Arsene Wenger saw fit to make that phone call to The Valley.

VIDEO (07/03): Luke Thurlbourne of King's Lynn - hang your head in shame. Watch as King's Lynn agree to knock the ball back to the Thrapston keeper in an uncontested drop-ball, only for the sneaky Thurlboune to crack it straight over the keeper and for the ref to give the goal!

VIDEO (07/03): This lady might be wanting to have a career rethink. Judging by the goals she lets in for the duration of this clip she may well be the worst goalkeeper on the planet. Judge for yourselves.

STORY (07/03): What's that you say? Mario Balotelli in trouble again? You don't say.

VIDEO (05/03): Roberto Mancini and Mario Balotelli - separated at birth? No, we don't think so either. BBC reporter Damian Johnson had difficulty telling the difference after Manchester City's win over Bolton on Saturday though.

VIDEO (02/03): Unperturbed by the 'racist' furore over Pepe Reina's ad, Spanish duo Andres Iniesta and Iker Casiallas plunge into a vaguely cringeworthy advert of their own. To explain - they're unleashed on the street and told to greet random pedestrians as if they're famous.